How to handle problematic situations?

[The Raven]

Forum should be a place where people discuss ideas, having fun or just read what is going on, like good all slackers.
However, from time to time a member or members can get into heated argument while debating religion or politics and it is on moderator or administrator to handle that situation. Now, the thing here is hard for the simple reason we humans are social beings and having one of them being a better friend may put pressure on you to make a fair decision.

Another thing that can happen is that a member, who is generally good for community and contributes, feel betrayed by the decision admin has made. That can easily make him/her leave the forum despite being maybe best contributor.

What would you do in such situation? What if the most valuable member makes a mistake and he is not right but you have to break it down to him/her he made a mistake when it comes to fighting another member. Would you play it off like you are not taking sides and just warn both of them to chill?

 

[Jane]

Hmm..tough one. If users want to argue..they can do it in pm where I cant see it. I wont tolerate blazing rows on the main forum. Simple as that,

 

[Empire]

Determine what you can control and what you can’t. There are many things we have little control of, yet cause us anxiety. The best bet is to control how you react to things outside of your control.

For things you can control you need to determine how you can prepare. For me, a lack of preparation causes me anxiety so I try to take the time needed to be ready for the situation. Study. Learn. Anticipate.

 

[Bluezone777]

I figure if you are capable of getting yourself into a heated argument then you should be more than capable of getting yourself out of one and if that is not the case then today is the day you learn how. The thing about fights is they are much like fires and like any fire if you don't feed it then it will eventually burn itself out on its own. The funniest thing is watching staff use mod tools and threats to attempt to put out fires only for them to actually feed the flames and make it worse.

 

[Joeychgo]

However, from time to time a member or members can get into heated argument while debating religion or politics and it is on moderator or administrator to handle that situation. Now, the thing here is hard for the simple reason we humans are social beings and having one of them being a better friend may put pressure on you to make a fair decision.

Okay, let me start here. My fix for this was to create a politics & news sub-forum, that then must be joined by the member to see the contents. Second, anything related that is out of that forum is either moved into it or is deleted. Period. The politics forum is essentially unmoderated, and it says so in the description.

What this does is protect the forum members in general from having to get caught up in the political stuff if they don't want to be exposed and give those who want to discuss politics a place to do so without being "censored" except in the worst circumstances.

What would you do in such situation? What if the most valuable member makes a mistake and he is not right but you have to break it down to him/her he made a mistake when it comes to fighting another member. Would you play it off like you are not taking sides and just warn both of them to chill?

Generally, I just talk the member(s) down -- I suggest they can put the other member on ignore if it's that bad. I can also force the ignore on the 2 members if its a repeated issue.

 

[Jane]

I do have a forum where users can ‘vent their spleen’..about anything that gets on their nerves…cold callers..rubbish service etc. I was a member of a forum,now long gone where they had a rows and rants forum, Basically a free for all where anything went…

 

[Cedric]

I do have a forum where users can ‘vent their spleen’..about anything that gets on their nerves…cold callers..rubbish service etc. I was a member of a forum,now long gone where they had a rows and rants forum, Basically a free for all where anything went…

I’ve never really had the urge of putting up a rant (sub)forum. I rant all the time, so it might be helpful sometimes. Now I keep my rants to the Premium members’ lounge. So they need to bare it sometimes, ha… 😂

 

[AjayJunkies]

A good tip I learned is to keep your responses very short and simple. Don't go explaining too much. And let the person vent themselves out.

Keep it as a small pebble on the road. Avoid showing someone how they were bad, just move on.

 

[Reverie]

A good tip I learned is to keep your responses very short and simple. Don't go explaining too much. And let the person vent themselves out.

Keep it as a small pebble on the road. Avoid showing someone how they were bad, just move on.

This is pretty sound advice. Typically we over explain, but often times the person like you said just needs to vent a bit.

 

[Kennysplash]

We are all from different countries and backgrounds, so disagreement is to be expected sometimes. But when that happens the step of action is to resolve the matter. That might have to involve compromise from either party involved.

 

[Empire]

ENd of the day people ahve options and choice