Did you ever lose a valuable member?

[Cedric]

It's a fact that not all members are created equal. Some stand out as experts on a particular topic or just as friendly personalities that everyone enjoys. Sometimes they even become the backbone of your forum community. Have you ever had one of these valuable members and then lost them? If so, what caused them to leave? Was there anything you could have done to prevent it or was it out of your control? And how did your forum cope with their loss?

 

[Heatman]

I would call myself a valuable member in one particular that I decided to leave at one point when it became so toxic to work with the staffs on the forum. It's not that I'm trying to brag but having been on the forum for years, I have over 16,000 posts with threads spread across the main section of the site but at one point, I couldn't take it. I had to leave. The owner came back twice trying to get me back but I was already done with the mods of the forum. I actually gave him terms with which I would come back to the community but he couldn't them. So, I stayed away.

 

[Arantor]

On the one hand I accept that I can't make them stay. If they don't want to participate, that's completely their prerogative, they don't owe me anything. But I will try to see why they're leaving and if it implies that I should have changed something or done something differently, and try to learn from that.

On the other hand, I've *been* that person. I've literally been the person who walked away from a forum after making 75,000 posts because what I thought were reasonable questions got unreasonable and inappropriate answers. I've also been the person who walked away from a forum after 23,000 posts when I realised that a non-trivial part of the forum management and a growing percentage of the discussion on the site were veering into personal politics that I utterly reject, and that forum even has 'what happened to Arantor?' posts after I disappeared. They owe me nothing, I owe them nothing - and if I am no longer enjoying my time, I will leave.

 

[Cory]

Most of the time I have no idea why valuable members leave because they just randomly disappear one day, sometimes you have no means of contacting them when their email is outdated/fake. Everyone moves on to what they consider bigger and better things, unfortunately, no matter how much of a great asset a member can be, you can't force them to stay a part of your community. Just like you can't force a staff member to not retire from their position.

 

[an0nym0us]

sooner or later everyone leaves, but the important thing is to leave a mark for other members who can come and continue the tradition..

 

[Niko]

I lost my co-founder many years ago.. he simply became too busy to follow even the community 😮‍💨
It was, I can say, the biggest loss 🥹

 

[Kale]

I feel as if many forums have lost valued members due to drama, the member losing interest, etc. I have lost an active poster or two before because of things going on in their life, issues with another user/member, etc. I always try to convince them to stay but many declined.

I lost a co-admin with my Harvest Moon forum due to I think both of our real lives being hectic at that time. I don't recall all complete reasons, but think we both just were busy and couldn't contribute to the forum. I was graduating in 2010 from high school, and think the co-admin was focusing on stuff I don't recall. I think that forum only lasted half a year or maybe a year, but am unsure.

 

[Heatman]

I lost my co-founder many years ago.. he simply became too busy to follow even the community 😮‍💨
It was, I can say, the biggest loss 🥹

I can remember when @Ash had to step down from Discussionhub.io. I believe that he was the initial owner but at one point he got too busy to take it up. He was a great loss to the forum. It didn't take long and the forum dropped so much activity.

 

[Cedric]

I can remember when @Ash had to step down from Discussionhub.io. I believe that he was the initial owner but at one point he got too busy to take it up. He was a great loss to the forum. It didn't take long and the forum dropped so much activity.

It's never good when the original owner steps down. In many cases it has proven to be the killer of a community.

 

[Kale]

I can remember when @Ash had to step down from Discussionhub.io. I believe that he was the initial owner but at one point he got too busy to take it up. He was a great loss to the forum. It didn't take long and the forum dropped so much activity.

Yep, it has sadly. I think I finally signed up but it just isn't near as active anymore.

It's never good when the original owner steps down. In many cases it has proven to be the killer of a community.

Always seem to be the case. It just kills off the forum completely.

 

[PGen98]

Oh absolutely! I've made many mistakes in the 20+ years I've been running forums, and that includes being a bit too over-reaching with some people in my younger days. I lost one in particular on one of my early forums who was a personality magnet, he just drew everyone to him. Charming, friendly, knowledgeable, everything you want in a member and a person, and I started asking him if he would join as a moderator, he said no and instead of being understanding I kept pushing hoping he would join. It ran him off and just as quickly as my forum started to boom while he was there it died a rapid and painful death as he left. Don't underestimate the good people, don't push them too hard, and if you do lose them, do your best to fill that void in the content.

 

[Cedric]

Oh absolutely! I've made many mistakes in the 20+ years I've been running forums, and that includes being a bit too over-reaching with some people in my younger days. I lost one in particular on one of my early forums who was a personality magnet, he just drew everyone to him. Charming, friendly, knowledgeable, everything you want in a member and a person, and I started asking him if he would join as a moderator, he said no and instead of being understanding I kept pushing hoping he would join. It ran him off and just as quickly as my forum started to boom while he was there it died a rapid and painful death as he left. Don't underestimate the good people, don't push them too hard, and if you do lose them, do your best to fill that void in the content.

That’s unfortunately. losing members is one of the biggest fears an Admin can have.

 

[PGen98]

That’s unfortunately. losing members is one of the biggest fears an Admin can have.

It's a hard lesson to have to learn, but one I am glad I did. It makes you realize how important your members are, and never take them for granted.

 

[Cedric]

It's a hard lesson to have to learn, but one I am glad I did. It makes you realize how important your members are, and never take them for granted.

Definitely agree with you there. With content comes members. And members make it all worthwhile to pour in your soul day after day.

 

[PGen98]

Definitely agree with you there. With content comes members. And members make it all worthwhile to pour in your soul day after day.

Absolutely true, your members are the only reason you can possibly be successful. They volunteer their time to post on your forum and it is our responsibility to make sure that we foster active discussion, wilful participation and a welcoming environment. Doing otherwise is only going to hinder your progress and ruin your community.

 

[Heatman]

Yep, it has sadly. I think I finally signed up but it just isn't near as active anymore

Yeah, the forum was no longer active like it used to be. From what I heard, the ownership have moved 3 times since Ash left it. I hope it falls into the hands of someone who's going to very committed to it.

 

[Reverie]

I feel as though I've slightly lost valuable members before. I have one person in mind. This user was a great person had wonderful ideas for the forum and what not. Two people did not like the user though and would take every opportunity to kind of argue with them. The two people were active - however they were very much just "let me check in" type members which is no big deal, but in this case it caused my person who was quite active in the community to leave and just become a check in person as well. Made me quite sad! I did ban the users responsible, not just for that but other reasons as well. They were quite negative and did not make the community feel very "community".

I do dislike when we lose such valuable members who contribute in one way or even multiple ways! Often though, if they truly are a valuable member they won't leave. I do understand though why this one kind of slowed down, I would have done the same in the same situation.

 

[ClicketyKat]

I lost a valuable member when I removed him from a private group because he failed to respond within 1 month to my call for all members of that section to reply and let me know if they wished to remain in the group.

 

[Ravenfreak]

I not only lost a valuable member on a forum once, I lost a staff member. I made a mistake moving the forum from phpBB to IPB, I don't even think I bothered to tell my co-admin and I regret that. I know now to actually communicate with other staff and my members before making a huge decisions. We all learn from our mistakes, and I've certainly learned from that one!